By Ava Collier

A wonderfully warm breeze caressed my face as I sat across from Dr. Curtis Wagner and his lovely wife of 20 years, Kristin. They graciously invited me to join them for lunch at The Tap Room at Dubsdread Restaurant in Orlando, Fl. The food was wonderful and the view outside from the patio of the lush green golf course was tranquil. Dr. Wagner, a successful podiatrist with his own practice at the Foot and Ankle Associates of Florida, left his office to meet up with his wife and myself at the restaurant. Kristin Wagner, a registered nurse, is tall and graceful and sits quietly next to her husband now as he speaks. I first met the Wagners when I worked at Orange County Medical Clinic and they came once a month to voluntarily provide medical care to our homeless and indigent patients. As a nurse, she assisted Dr. Wagner in patient care and they worked beautifully as a team, side by side.

Still dressed in his scrubs, he is speaking about his practice. “I’ve been in practice for about 24 years now. There are seven of us in the group now and I have been volunteering at Orange County Clinic for about 12 years.” I asked them both about how important it is to maintain balance and friendship in their marriage. I also asked how vital is pursuing individual interests apart from each other. Although Kristin does not work with her husband in his practice, she stated that it is important to still have interests that help to make her a better woman, wife and mother. “I guess the biggest thing for me is exercise. I take classes at the Y and take yoga. I do drag him with me every now and then. I also do a lot of volunteer work and substitute teaching at a preschool and religious education at our church. It gives you something to talk about when you come back together.”

Dr. Wagner agreed. “It’s very important. You have to find that balance and spend time together making those times count. But you also have to have an individual life that make you grow and do things that make you feel accomplished and also I think it gives you’re able to give that much more to your spouse when you’re together. It’s a balance of sharing and individuality.” Dr. Wagner says he also enjoys exercising and swimming. “We have our times where at least twice a year we have a day or two that I’m just with my friends or she’s just with her friends. It’s important because it re-bonds relationships that were important from college. All of that together makes you grow as a person and appreciate the things you share together.”

Dr. Wagner referred to a passage in best selling author Steven Covey’s book, 7 Habits of Highly Effective People. “ ‘Sharpen the saw’; every day the lawn cutter has to sharpen their saw to get the job done, it may get repetitive but it’s important. Everyday you go home and do the stuff it takes to make things work. When I get off from work, I’m tired after a long day. But my kids, for them, I’m just getting home for the first time. I give my energy to them when I get home even though I’m tired because that’s all they’re seeing. This applies to spouses too. We all get tired and frustrated but you have to put effort into it every day.”

I asked them how important a sense of humor is in a relationship. They both looked at each other and started laughing. Kristin quickly adds “I have three children, him being my third,” she says as she tilts her head in his direction. Dr. Wagner chimes in, “I’m a kid at heart. Every day you want to have some fun so things don’t get mundane. Although Kristin is very organized and detailed oriented, she doesn’t take things to seriously and that helps to keep me balance.” In addition to a sense of humor, time together and apart, the Wagners agreed that faith is also a necessary ingredient for a successful and lasting marriage. “Faith in God and following his teachings and commandments, to love your wife/husband and kids…it makes a difference.”

A special thank you to Dr. and Mrs. Wagner. They have been trendsetters in my community for a long time working quietly and diligently while providing necessary healthcare to the uninsured and underinsured citizens of Orlando, Florida. Thanks, Dr. Wagner, for being my personal physician for so long and taking such good care of my feet and ankles over the years!