By Dr. Leslie Ashlock

Children and all others born into this world are from God and are here to earn and help others to earn exaltation. This is our common task—to help each other follow the example of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ and to become more like him. When parents catch the vision that the soul was given to them by the Lord so that they can lead and guide him/her to achieve the very best that they possibly can, then parents will understand that they have not been cheated.

If someone has a child that learns differently or has a mild, moderate, or severe learning disability, then parents have a special opportunity to grow through love and service and to help their child help others grow in the same way. Sometimes when parents first learn that their child has a learning difference or learning disability, they feel betrayed or cheated. This perspective, though understandable, is not God’s perspective. The scriptures teach, “For the Lord seeth not as man seeth; for man looketh on the outward appearance, but the Lord looketh on the heart.” (I Samuel 16:7)

Research indicates that parental reaction to the diagnosis of a learning difference/disability is more pronounced than in any other area of exceptionality. The pre-school development of the learning differenced/disabilities child is often uneventful and the parent may not suspect that a problem exists. When informed of the problem by school personnel, the parent’s first reaction is generally to deny the existence of a learning difference or disability. This denial is, of course, unproductive. Research also indicates that parents go through a series of emotions before truly accepting the child and his/her problem. These “stages” are totally unpredictable. A parent may move from stage-to-stage in random. Some parents skip over stages while others remain in one stage for an extended period. These stages are as follows:

DENIAL: “There is nothing wrong with my child. He’ll grow out of it!”

BLAME: “It’s not from my side of the family.”

FEAR: “I wonder if they are telling me the real problem or is it worse.”

ENVY: “None of my other children are like this.”

MOURNING: “She could’ve been such a success if not for her learning problem.”

BARGAINING: “It’s probably the teacher. We need to change schools.”

ANGER: “The teachers don’t know anything! I hate this school.”

GUILT: “I shouldn’t have used cloth diapers like my mother said.”

ISOLATION: “Nobody else knows or cares about my child.”

FLIGHT: “Let’s try this new therapy—I heard Dr. Phil say it would work.

We are going from clinic to clinic until somebody tells me what I want to hear!”

The pattern of these reactions is totally unpredictable. It is important for families to recognize differences and make sure their child is in the best suitable environment. For more information or to find out if Solid Foundation is a suitable environment for your child, please visit our website at www.solidfoundationinc.net or call 770-469-3211.